15 February, 2007

New goals in life include...

I ramble on and on about 24 on a weekly basis, but I do realize it's only a TV show, not, as some people ::coughGwencough:: seem to think I feel, life.

But shit, away from 24, Kiefer William Frederick Dempsey George Rufus Sutherland is the man. From the news and all the gossip I hear about him, he's absolutely insane when left to his own devices. Kiefer's entire life is lived out like Jack Bauer's after a 24 hour shit show.

The guy is definitely not as strait-laced as his character, or anything he's been in for that matter. Gossip column's occasionally report his appearance at some dive bar with a group of buddies, demanding a tab be started with a Jim Beam on the rocks at 9 am. Straight whiskey in a dive bar at 9 am? Done and done. You just KNOW he's having a good time.

I'm not reckless by nature, nor do I like being drunk, really. However, I would certainly make an exception if I got the chance to drink with Kiefer Sutherland. Wouldn't you? If the answer is no, stop reading. If you're still with me, carry on.

One witness from such a a recent outing said Kiefer claimed his wallet was "indisposed." He said "It's been stolen! I promise I'll come back and pay." The witness said:
"He started to go into a series of karate kicks in the middle of the floor while the bartender, waitress and several customers looked on," a source reports. Thankfully, a star-struck fan agreed to buy him several J&B's on the rocks. After devouring a plate of chicken wings and littering the floor with bones, the star left without tipping."
Seriously, dude is karate kicking in the middle of a bar BEFORE he was drunk. He's one of the highest paid TV actors out there and yet some fan is buying him Beam. Unbelievable, but also awesome. Plus he's living in the middle ages still, just throwing bones on the floor. I'm sure waiters and bartenders hate the dude, but that's why I want to hang with him for a night.

Here are a few news/gossip reports from the past as further required reading.

- Attacking a Christmas tree while drunk

- Indecent Exposure and the like

- Transvestite fun

- Impromptu male revue performance

- Bar fight requiring stitches

Like I said, I'm not a big drinker, but you can see how this guy would be insane to hang with for a night. I think I'm going to make it my personal mission in life to have this happen.

I've definitely heard a couple times of people seeing him in a bar and then ending up hanging out with he and his small group for the rest of the night. I need to be that person. I would certainly throw my generally reserved drinking habits to the wind, that's for sure. Not that I'd be all about the taking my pants off (or him taking his pants off for that matter), but still.

Amazing photoshop contest with a theme appropriate to this post.

Some random facts about Kiefer from IMDB:
- Traveled with the rodeo circuit in the late 1990s and won rodeos in Phoenix and Albuquerque.

- When starting up on the rodeo circuit he decided to buy all the things needed. The horses, the bulls/cows, the tractors, the 900 acre ranch in Montana, then sold it once he was finished.

- Plays ice hockey on a celebrity team.

- Earned first place in the US Team Roping Championships.

- Is close friends with hockey legend Wayne Gretzky

- Is a huge fan of the rock band Queen

You know he'd go insane at Bob and Barbara's here in Philly. $3 for a shot of Jim Beam and a PBR can. Well, insane or dead.

Kiefer, if you're the kind of person who google's himself and you happen to see this blog, e-mail me. Seriously. That would be about the best thing ever.


Blogger James said...

Jesus fucking Christ, I want to party with Kiefer. He'd probably not enjoy partying with me, cuz I'd spend the evening related his drunken antics to moments from 24, but hey, what does he know.

Seriously, fucking dude attacked a 12 ft Christmas tree. I'm totally rushing his frat in the fall.

9:18 PM, February 15, 2007  
Blogger Drew said...

Why can't anyone spell this guy's right (referring to the tabloid)? You know the rule: I before E, except after seeing Kiefer drinking scotch at a gay bar at nine in the morning.

9:27 PM, February 15, 2007  
Blogger Adam said...

It's funny, I think we give him a pass to party his ass off in real life because the character he plays on "24" is so miserable and depressed that we want him to be happy.

Genius reporting, Lou. I love it.

1:17 PM, February 20, 2007  

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