23 March, 2007

It's on the menu, dick. Figure it out.

Gwen fell asleep the other night with the remote in her hand. She had adjusted the volume and didn't have the energy to put the clicker back on the table. She later explained that it was probably her ingrained fear that once she fell asleep I would take the remote from her and put on sports. This if course is entirely true, as I discovered her in this position when I was coming over to do just that.

This tiny woman with Lisa Loeb glasses comes in today and mulls over the menu for a few minutes, weighing her options and 'humphh'-ing mightily to herself throughout. Speaking of Lisa Loeb she's really hot. Like really hot. Anyhow this woman in the shop who was decidedly not as attractive as Lisa Loeb finally turns around and approaches me. She orders a hot chocolate with skim milk and 'not too much chocolate.' Fair enough.

I go to the basement and get the skim milk because there was none in the fridge. I make up her drink, which was 'for here,' making it a large by default. Not my rules, but them's the breaks. So I make up her drink all nice and shit. I even made a little chocolate pattern in the foam on the top in the shape of the Eiffel tower. Kidding, it was actually a little grid pattern with rounded corners and shit.

Anyway I put the thing on the counter, and ring her up. Large hot chocolate, $3.60. With tax it's like $3.89. Yeah, it's expensive, but whatever, that's not the point.

She looks up in surprise and says "That's the most expensive hot chocolate I've ever heard of."

"Sorry, I don't set the prices, I just make the drinks" I reply.

"I'm not going to pay that much for a hot chocolate, you'll have to charge me less" she says.

"Would you like me to get you something else that's less expensive," I reply. "The prices are next to the drinks on the menu..."

She'd spent almost five minutes looking at the damn menu then acted all surprised and indignant when I rang the drink up for ::gasp:: the listed price. Fucking idiot.

She got a coffee and sat sullenly at one of the tables in the front. I gave her the change and sat in the back, satisfied with m piping hot, free hot chocolate.

Insider's tip: Here are the 'good deals' at my shop. A bagel with cream cheese, butter or jelly is like $1.63. A Chicken Salad Sandwich is like $4.05 (it's damn good chicken salad). If you're getting a drink ask for a small in a to go cup even if you're staying in the shop. And don't get the hot chocolate.

I shaved my beard. Now it's in the form of a Trot Nixon for the foreseeable future. I rule.
Speaks for itself. If you don't get it, there's a hot chocolate I'd like to sell you.My dad sent me this. I need this shirt. And I need to hang out with this guy.

6 Comments:

Blogger Mike said...

Fun stuff. I like the "Angry Lou" posts.

Chicken Salad Sandwich is like $4.05 (it's damn good chicken salad)

That is a good deal. Your boss better get his (her?) shit togetehr and fix that oversight.

11:23 AM, March 24, 2007  
Blogger Gwen said...

oh i get it! she's smoking! hardy har har. dumb bitch.

11:56 AM, March 24, 2007  
Blogger Drew said...

Ugh, Trot would have a tribal tattoo.

7:42 PM, March 24, 2007  
Blogger S'orlok Reaves said...

Ah, a pinyata of enjoyable moments. And, yes, that shirt is perfectly suitable for you.

PS: Spinelli sells bagels + cream cheese, so I can now get the world's best to-go breakfast on campus.

11:32 PM, March 24, 2007  
Blogger James said...

Wow, I think next time you should spike wannabe-Loeb's drink with something horrible (not too much urine!).

Cunt.

1:32 PM, March 26, 2007  
Blogger Adam said...

(to the guy on the bottom)

Dad? Is that you?

8:22 AM, March 27, 2007  

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